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The Good Son
Gurian
(A
Fine Young Man),
one of today's premier writers on the subject of male development,
moves beyond the realm of sociological and psychological analysis
(offered in Eli Newberger's fine The
Men They Will Become,
see p. 71) to provide a timely and practical parenting guide. Focusing
specifically on the subject of moral development, a matter of hot
debate in the wake of such tragedies as the Columbine High School
shooting. Gurian writes from his own experience as a family therapist.
Citing an "increase in ethical numbness, moral distraction, and
spiritual emptiness among boys and young men," he examines the roots of
potential problems such as the abandonment of our children's moral
development to "potentially toxic" visual media and then lays out a
well-organized blueprint for ushering boys into adulthood. Gurian
discusses such topics as biological and neurological development as
well as building spiritual life and dealing with media influence (for
example, he notes that a boy of nine or 10 should not "see images he
cannot or should not experience with his own body and soul at this time
in his life"). Gurian
concludes with a list of age-appropriate books
and movies that "stimulate moral growth in boys." Parents and
caregivers will welcome the direction and reassurance of this
outstanding book in their efforts to guide boys "toward loving, wise,
and responsible manhood the compassionate life."
— From Publishers
Weekly
Copyright 1999 Reed Business
Information, Inc.
Here are two solid books with practical advice on how to raise
well-adjusted, ethical young boys. The
Good Son is the culminating
third volume of Gurian's
best-selling series (The
Wonder of Boys, A
Fine Young Man)
about raising young males to become responsible men. Like many recent
scholars, such as Gad Cudner (Small Criminal Among Us), Gurian offers
ethical explanations of youth violence: his "good son parenting plan"
revolves around morality and discipline. Astutely synthesizing Jean
Piaget's cognitive and Lawrence Kohlberg's moral stages of development,
he gives detailed guidelines for instilling "good virtues" during each
of three stages of moral development: obedience (birth to six),
convention (seven to 12), and moral intuition (13 to 18). On the other
hand, and in contrast to Donald Black (Bad Boys, Mad Men: Confronting
Antisocial Personality Disorder, LJ 3/1/99), who emphasizes genetic
attribution, Newberger (pediatrics, Harvard Medical School) thinks that
the best explanation for boys' misbehavior is the interplay of
biological drives and "character" development. He claims that boys are
born with malleable "innate temperaments" that can be transformed into
positive "male characteristics" such as self-control, courage, honesty,
and sportsmanship. In short, boys can become leaders without resorting
to violence. Both Gurian and
Newberger use anecdotes to show that
raising good sons need not be difficult, and their books are timely,
insightful additions to the current debate on youth violence and school
shootings. Recommended for public and academic libraries. Chogollah
Maroufi, California State Univ., Los Angeles, CA.
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